Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
