My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
The adults are the big ones right?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
