i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
