Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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