Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.