Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
