Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
