she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
