just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
