I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
