I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
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