I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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