Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize