no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
