That's intense
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
