I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Randomize
