note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize