so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
