It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
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I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
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I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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