What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
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