What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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