I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball