no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
you never un-have a 4some
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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