She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
