I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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