i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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