Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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