Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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