16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
