She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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