I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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