Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
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He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
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I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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