let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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