It's Friday. Sex?
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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