He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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