Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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