Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
