idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I need a hoe opinion
go on
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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