Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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