do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
