found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
don't judge my taste in strippers
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
