Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
