She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize