dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize