I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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