I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize