He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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