I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
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