Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
