i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
