I heard we made out
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize