hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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