Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
